Letters to Zoe

Zoe Grace,

I miss you. I want my sweet, adorable little baby back in my arms.  I will never forget you, you will always be in my heart and on my mind.  I promise to share your beautiful story with others.  Londyn Joy will never forget you.  We will always talk of you and the beautiful little fighter you are. 

You have taught me to never take time for granted.  Time is so precious and valuable now more than ever.  I wish I held you more, I wish I spent every waking second with you.  I am so glad that I had the chance to know you and see your precious spirit lighten our lives.  You have touched so far; your reach for a 4 month old extends that of many.  I will advocate for you, I will help others who are in the same situation and need support.  So many love you; I just wish they met the Zoe I know. 

Your spirit has matured in 4 months more than others their entire life.  I know when I see you again you won’t be the baby I remember, but I know I’ll recognize you because of your truly beautiful spirit.  The Lord will make you perfect in body again.  You are free from pain, your heart will no longer ache, and you will be able to do anything you desire but my heart wishes I could have been your father for much longer.  I know you have work to do on the other side.  I know you will touch others on the other side of the veil more than the lives you have touched here. 

You have suffered so much here and all you knew was pain but you smiled.  I will never forget that. Be at peace, be at rest my wonderfully perfect daughter.



My Dear Sweet Baby Girl,

            I have loved you so much from the moment I first knew you were going to join our family.  My love for you has grown into a love that I never knew existed.  You have opened my eyes to our Heavenly Father and Savior, Jesus Christ.  Without them, I would not have the assurance that we will be together again for all eternity.

I know in my heart and soul that we will be together after our time here on earth, but it is so hard to say goodbye.  Today, I was able to dress you in your beautiful blessing gown as I had done just 2 months ago and was reminded of that very sweet moment when your daddy gave you a blessing.  I will never forget that day.  Today was different as I held you one last time and laid you to rest in the exquisite casket that your grandparents made for you.  It was so hard to realize that your spirit is no longer with us and that we were holding just your tiny and fragile little body. 

Over the past week, I have missed your sweet noises, chomping on your hands, your beautiful eyes and soft hands and feet.  I miss holding you close and feeling your heartbeat.  I will always cherish the moments I had with you, carrying you for nine months in my belly, the day you were born, all of the sleepless nights, appointments and hospital visits.  They were all worth it because I was able to know you and learn from you.

Zoe, you have taught me to savor every moment and minute of this life.  Heavenly Father has sent us here to learn and teach.  Because of you, I am inspired to be a better wife, mother and person.  I hope you will always teach me and that I may be worthy to have your sweet spirit with me at all times.  You have taught me to enjoy motherhood, through the good days and the bad.  My time with you was so short and I wish I had held you and kissed you every minute of every day.  I WILL always remember to hold and kiss my children every day, with a few extra hugs for you.  I will always honor your father and love him unconditionally.  We will miss you terribly and think of you every day, but we will do everything we can to return to you again. 

I love you so much my sweet girl.  You have blessed our lives, our families and our hearts.  I hope you are dancing and singing above us. 

Forever in my heart,

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