5.06.2011

Eat. Pray. Love.


So I'm creeping up on two years since I gave birth to the almost 10 pounds of Londyn Joy.  Having struggled with an eating disorder most of my adolescent life, let's just say the 60 lbs. I gained while prego was a tough reality to face.  I look back now and really should have cut back on the 20 piece chicken nugget runs... countless times a week and probably should have thrown out the words "super size it" from my vocabulary.  I have always LOVED food and it is one of my many struggles as I also have a really hard time accepting my body in the way it was given to me.  

Between my teenage years and now, I have popped almost every diet pill on the shelves, tried strenuous diets- including no carbs, hormone injections and prepackaged meals.  It even got as ugly as not eating at all or the worst, binging and purging.

I am finally starting to get a glimpse at how unrealistic the bodies are on the covers of People & Cosmo mags.  To aspire to look like those women would be to forget everything that I am about.  I would not be able to focus on my family and be the best me.  I would spend too much time living for just myself, rather than for my husband, daughter and Heavenly Father.  It really is a tough world out there and as I teach the Young Women in my ward, I am constantly praying for them to see what I didn't see in myself at their age.  

A couple week ago, I started the Weight Watchers lifestyle.  Now, I say lifestyle because I don't feel like it's a diet.  I am eating everything I would normally eat but with more of a healthy perspective on what I am putting in my body.  It is more of a game with all the points and I feel like I am winning!  I officially weigh less than I did when I found out I was pregnant with LJ.  It feels good to be back down to a healthy weight, but my body will never be the same.  Things just aren't where they once were.  A song that comes to mind is, "One of these things is not like the other..." haha  

Anyway, I am going to continue being active, thinking before I eat, drinking diet coke whenever I feel like it and most importantly, enjoying life without revolving it around food and numbers on the scale!

3 comments:

Erika and Bryan said...

It is most definitely a lifestyle change. I am currently walk that same road. I too have been doing weight watchers. Great job keep up the good work it is not always easy. Its the year of change we can all do it if we want it.

Laura said...

Good Job Girl!!! I am so nervous for my girls to face that challenge when they get older. It IS a tough world, and only getting harder! You are doing a great job, and look great!!

The Leiths said...

i wish i was there for you more when we were in high school. i'm glad you have realized how great of a person you are though! crazy how the way you look just doesn't matter as much when you have a family and realize what's REALLY important. love you!