Yesterday, we had our last visit with Endre, our doula. It's hard to believe that we were meeting for the last time before the big day. She is always so informative and helpful in making us feel more and more comfortable with our anticipated birthing experience. I really appreciate her way of educating me of my options and what to expect. It is such a comfort to know that she will be there, in labor and delivery.
This morning I had my weekly check with the midwife. Unfortunately, I didn't get to see her today as her schedule was swamped, but I did see her nurse practitioner who I have seen in the past and have had great care, thus far. She answered my last few questions that I had about the birth and regular protocol. Routinely, she measured my belly, checked the baby's heartbeat and my cervix. Size and heartbeat are fabulous and show a big, healthy baby. As far as my cervix goes, minimal progress from last week but looking good. Londyn just keeps moving lower and lower. I don't need anyone to check me to know that... I could tell you myself that she is low! Low... as in right on top of my bladder!
All was fine and dandy... and a relatively quick visit. The usual was said, "we'll see you back in one week." As usual, I went to the front desk to schedule my next visit. The woman in front of me was also scheduling and the receptionist said, "Nan will be on vacation next week, are you comfortable seeing Tamara... the nurse practitioner?" Instantly, I froze... in fear of what I had just heard. When it was my turn, I quickly asked if she was going to be available to deliver my baby, considering I am due next Thursday. The receptionist gave me a blank stare... and said, "hold on just a sec." Now I was worried. Shortly after that, Tamara - the nurse practitioner came out and told me that a couple other practitioners would be covering for Nan, taking her call and delivering her babies. At this point in time... I was on the verge of tears.
How come this was never mentioned?
Why am I just finding out a week before my due date?
All this time, seeing and trusting my midwife... and now some stranger will be in charge of delivering our baby?
Of course, when I got out of the clinic and into the car... I was in tears. How could this be? I called my doula to figure out what I should do. She was very real in letting me know that I have every right to be upset, but unfortunately the situation is not going to change and now is the time to consider my options. It was a relief and a reality check that no, I can't change the given situation but under the circumstances- I do have options. I am going to do my research on the two midwives that are covering for her and I might even schedule a visit to meet them.
At this point, I'm feeling much better about the situation and am just grateful to have my husband, doula and family to be present and full of support.